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post #1 of 22 (permalink) Old 05-29-2010, 10:26 PM Thread Starter
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ADVICE FROM A RETIRED HUSBAND:

It is important for men to remember that as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.

My name is Mike. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Judy. When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Judy to get a full-time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed. Shortly after she started working I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work.

Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Mens Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door.

She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating, but now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.

Another symptom of aging is complaining. I think. For example she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any -- if you know what I mean. I like to think tact is one of my strong points.

When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half-finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.

I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Judy. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.

Retirement is wonderful.

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Never, under any circumstances, combine a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

Mike - Retired FoMoCo Tradesman
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post #2 of 22 (permalink) Old 05-29-2010, 11:26 PM
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Hey Mike you must know my son-in-law, that sounds just like him except he is not retired.

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post #3 of 22 (permalink) Old 05-29-2010, 11:55 PM
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Hey Mike, this is going to get interesting.
I can't wait for the responses.
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post #4 of 22 (permalink) Old 05-30-2010, 05:12 AM
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............yer....good one Mike....must remember to suggest some of that to the bride.....and then DUCK!............AL
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post #5 of 22 (permalink) Old 05-30-2010, 09:50 AM
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Hi Mike, you really like living on the edge. If we do not get feed back from the the female gender and their views of retirement I will be shocked.

I bet you sleep with one eye open , the other is likely swelled shut.

My father was a man who had these ideals, a woman's place was in the kitchen barefoot and pregnant. I loved my father but really disliked some of his thinking.

My youngest daughter (30) works in the construction industry for a large local company, started as a cashier and now in human resources. As she rose through the ranks she got her degree in business and is now completing her masters in business.

A story she told me stands out in my head. While she was department head for this company, she put in a request to take a fork lift course. Her manager very stupidly said, "why do you need a fork lift course, you are a female".

She is a petite blonde and very mild mannered, until that happened. She told him her thinking on the statement and took it to his superior. The short story she got her course and he got a reprimand.

This type of thinking still exists. A great subject and well posted for controversy and eye opening thinking.

To clarify my position, I believe we (as a species) can do whatever we would like to pursue. That gender should not be stereo typed based on antique thinking. My better half and I have raised our 5 children, with this thinking.

What a great subject,, yes sir!

John

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post #6 of 22 (permalink) Old 05-31-2010, 12:33 AM
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I am all for equal rights the only issue I have is some friends who are firefighters have voiced to me about an issue that came up regarding how when a couple of girls couldn't pass the exam they made a stink about how it wasn't made so a female could pass it so they lowered the bar to make it more equal to avoid law suits..... that dont sound very equal to me and ironically enough the female firefighters who joined and passed the course with flying colors before they lowered the bar was equally P'ed off if not more so than the men were... this is just one example of where this kind of thing can get out of hand.

Dont forget to live life for fear of death grasp each day and live it to it full otherwise it is pointless.

Last edited by newwoodworker; 05-31-2010 at 12:35 AM.
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post #7 of 22 (permalink) Old 05-31-2010, 06:50 PM
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Hey Paul

I don't disagree with you. There are times that the system does not work. I am a positive thinker and look at all the times it does work.

I believe no matter what system is in place it will not be perfect. To have both genders thinking this is not correct points that the system works,,,, to a degree!!!!

There will always be them, both male and female that cry sour grapes because of their own inability to meet the requirements for that position. Hey look at one time women could not vote,,,, what you say!

I do not see women as needing the bar lowered, and those that do lower the bar show a lack of respect for a women s ability.

I guess I am saying equal opportunity is what I believe. That is only my opinion.

John

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post #8 of 22 (permalink) Old 05-31-2010, 08:07 PM
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"I guess I am saying equal opportunity is what I believe."

I agree as long the requires are equal and there is not any special treatment to allow either sex to do a specific job to stop someone complaining then im all for it.

Dont forget to live life for fear of death grasp each day and live it to it full otherwise it is pointless.
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post #9 of 22 (permalink) Old 06-01-2010, 04:10 AM
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Good morning Paul, 5:00am here and a day of work ahead,,, yup!

We both are on the same page, we just chose to get there by a different route.

Equal rights, equal requirements, equal pay. In certain walks of life I am not a popular man because of my beliefs.

Have a great day and will chat again.

John

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post #10 of 22 (permalink) Old 06-01-2010, 09:16 AM
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Yup equal pay is still a big issue today even in social security which is completely wrong from what i've heard a lady and a gentleman can pay in the exact same amount of money over a working lifetime but when it comes to collecting that check from SS the ladys checks are a lot less.
Ive known many lady's threw out my life that could and have worked circles around a lot of men who i have worked with.

Dont forget to live life for fear of death grasp each day and live it to it full otherwise it is pointless.
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