How much! £30. Il need a trailer to pick it up. Pick what up. The 50-gall drum it comes in. You won’t need a trailer for a gallon tub. No, no, no. It can’t be. Is so came the reply. Are you telling me we have to spend my pension on weed killer? Yes, came the reply from my good wife.
Now my wife has the green fingers. I on the other hand do not have, or possess any abilities that contribute to the nurturing of gods green pastures. I am a proud concrete and tarmac affiliate. But as every husband knows reading this post it’s not about one’s requirement and desire to create the perfect batch of sand, cement and just the right amount of water, no it’s about nodding one’s head to keep the peace.
So, after receiving the news that the producers of weed killer were all multi-millionaire Aires, I decided to google around looking for alternatives as my wife informed me, she goes through about three gallons of the stuff during the summer. What I did find out was there was very little difference in price between manufactures. Although on a trip to Houston, I did notice you pay a lot less than we do in the UK. Tax on goods in Texas was about 6% whereas here it is 20% which makes quite a difference. So, what to do.
So here is what I came up with. I did notice you could purchase the equivalent of a Flame thrower, but it came with a small bottle of gas that runs out quickly, so I placed my inventors’ hat on and headed out to the workshop.
Being a plumber I in my earlier days often used propane for a variety of jobs and a 10lb (3.9kg) bottle lasts forever. It came with a standard hose and Bullfinch torch. I ordered a felt roofing extension tube and 42mm (1 1/2) head and I removed the hose and replaced with an extra-long one that reaches the places no other does.
Now I am not going into the actual fabrication as it’s self-evident from the photos and really involved a lot of cutting and welding. I did draw everything out to scale on cardboard and just used that. I recently bought a small 140watt welder and after looking at lots of U Tube welding videos I eventually found out how to produce the perfect weld. Yes, you have guessed it, also buy a 5-inch grinder and grind the hell out of all your welds before anyone sees them, and finish off with extra thick metallic paint. Works for me.
I added various bits to hold the hose and torch and the igniter is just Velcro.
One down side to the extra-long torch extension was my wife was having trouble wielding it, I bored out a piece of 25mm (1inch) round tube and cut it in half and welded it back around the extension tube with a bored and tapped handle and thumb screw to tighten the handle in whatever position suits her.
Now a warning to my fellow members. I took a worldwide patent on this contraption. It’s a prototype number 1 of 1. Do not try to copy this unless you have a really good grinder. I reckon on the open market it’s worth a million plus in anyone’s money. Please if you wish to purchase it do not embarrass yourself by offering less than six figures. Although I will include postage, unless you live in Texas.
To summarize I know what you are thinking, isn’t he a wonderful husband, making his good wife’s life so much easier, could I have done any better, no I don’t think so. Although I did have reservations when I took her out to the workshop to reveal my latest creation. She just stood looking at it for some considerable time, not saying anything atoll. Her head I noticed was moving imperceptibly almost unseen to the naked eye, to such an extent I’m not sure if it was up or down or side to side, and there was intermittent muttering that I couldn’t quite make out, I assume it was praise.
On a lighter note (excuse the pun) she did take it for its maiden run (see photo) and a resounding success with weeds fleeing the scene. Couple of early hiccups. She did manage to melt the toe of her left shoe and the front door mat had to be humanly euthanized.
So that’s it lads and lasses from the most considerate husband in Scotland. Flame On.
Colin.
Ps.
When I travel to Houston, I am always being told how everything is bigger in Texas. Well, this week we took a drive to Brechin Castle Centre and my wife spotted this, yes, the biggest dustpan and brush in Scotland and Texas. £20 it stayed on the shelf.
Now my wife has the green fingers. I on the other hand do not have, or possess any abilities that contribute to the nurturing of gods green pastures. I am a proud concrete and tarmac affiliate. But as every husband knows reading this post it’s not about one’s requirement and desire to create the perfect batch of sand, cement and just the right amount of water, no it’s about nodding one’s head to keep the peace.
So, after receiving the news that the producers of weed killer were all multi-millionaire Aires, I decided to google around looking for alternatives as my wife informed me, she goes through about three gallons of the stuff during the summer. What I did find out was there was very little difference in price between manufactures. Although on a trip to Houston, I did notice you pay a lot less than we do in the UK. Tax on goods in Texas was about 6% whereas here it is 20% which makes quite a difference. So, what to do.
So here is what I came up with. I did notice you could purchase the equivalent of a Flame thrower, but it came with a small bottle of gas that runs out quickly, so I placed my inventors’ hat on and headed out to the workshop.
Being a plumber I in my earlier days often used propane for a variety of jobs and a 10lb (3.9kg) bottle lasts forever. It came with a standard hose and Bullfinch torch. I ordered a felt roofing extension tube and 42mm (1 1/2) head and I removed the hose and replaced with an extra-long one that reaches the places no other does.
Now I am not going into the actual fabrication as it’s self-evident from the photos and really involved a lot of cutting and welding. I did draw everything out to scale on cardboard and just used that. I recently bought a small 140watt welder and after looking at lots of U Tube welding videos I eventually found out how to produce the perfect weld. Yes, you have guessed it, also buy a 5-inch grinder and grind the hell out of all your welds before anyone sees them, and finish off with extra thick metallic paint. Works for me.
I added various bits to hold the hose and torch and the igniter is just Velcro.
One down side to the extra-long torch extension was my wife was having trouble wielding it, I bored out a piece of 25mm (1inch) round tube and cut it in half and welded it back around the extension tube with a bored and tapped handle and thumb screw to tighten the handle in whatever position suits her.
Now a warning to my fellow members. I took a worldwide patent on this contraption. It’s a prototype number 1 of 1. Do not try to copy this unless you have a really good grinder. I reckon on the open market it’s worth a million plus in anyone’s money. Please if you wish to purchase it do not embarrass yourself by offering less than six figures. Although I will include postage, unless you live in Texas.
To summarize I know what you are thinking, isn’t he a wonderful husband, making his good wife’s life so much easier, could I have done any better, no I don’t think so. Although I did have reservations when I took her out to the workshop to reveal my latest creation. She just stood looking at it for some considerable time, not saying anything atoll. Her head I noticed was moving imperceptibly almost unseen to the naked eye, to such an extent I’m not sure if it was up or down or side to side, and there was intermittent muttering that I couldn’t quite make out, I assume it was praise.
On a lighter note (excuse the pun) she did take it for its maiden run (see photo) and a resounding success with weeds fleeing the scene. Couple of early hiccups. She did manage to melt the toe of her left shoe and the front door mat had to be humanly euthanized.
So that’s it lads and lasses from the most considerate husband in Scotland. Flame On.
Colin.
Ps.
When I travel to Houston, I am always being told how everything is bigger in Texas. Well, this week we took a drive to Brechin Castle Centre and my wife spotted this, yes, the biggest dustpan and brush in Scotland and Texas. £20 it stayed on the shelf.
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